Stefan Mileschin

Lucky no one was killed

In a shocking display of blind faith in Silicon Valley's shiny gadgets, a pair of Apple zealots nearly caused a fatal disaster, all thanks to the tech giant's "Findmy" fiasco.

Two brothers, fresh from munching waffles, found themselves sans cars and AirPods, victims of a brazen carjacking.

St. Louis County Police were summoned to the scene and tipped off by a mate of the victims. He claimed that using the power of Steve Jobs, he could sniff out the missing AirPods using Apple's super advanced digital bloodhound technology. The app, supposedly a beacon of hope, pointed directly to the Brittany family's home.

Relying entirely on their faith in Apple products and software, the Police called in a SWAT team. Brittany Shamily was at home with her children, including an infant, when the SWAT team broke down the door with a battering ram.

Body camera footage from the scene shows Shamily coming to the front door, her hands up, her face a mix of fright and utter confusion at the heavily armed folly making its way from her front porch into her foyer. "Oh my god," she says. The SWAT team was looking for guns and other material related to a carjacking that had occurred that morning.

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