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19th February 2009, 19:30 | #1 |
Madshrimp Join Date: May 2002 Location: 7090/Belgium
Posts: 79,022
| Huh? News of the day: King Kong vs Chewbacca Defence Chewbacca Defence Cochran Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, Chef's attorney would certainly want you to believe that his client wrote "Stinky Britches" ten years ago. And they make a good case. Hell, I almost felt pity myself! But, ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, I have one final thing I want you to consider. Ladies and gentlemen, this is Chewbacca. Chewbacca is a Wookiee from the planet Kashyyyk. But Chewbacca lives on the planet Endor. Now think about it; that does not make sense!Gerald Broflovski Damn it!Chef What?Gerald He's using the Chewbacca defense!Cochran Why would a Wookiee, an eight-foot tall Wookiee, want to live on Endor, with a bunch of two-foot tall Ewoks? That does not make sense! But more important, you have to ask yourself: What does this have to do with this case? Nothing. Ladies and gentlemen, it has nothing to do with this case! It does not make sense! Look at me. I'm a lawyer defending a major record company, and I'm talkin' about Chewbacca! Does that make sense? Ladies and gentlemen, I am not making any sense! None of this makes sense! And so you have to remember, when you're in that jury room deliberatin' and conjugatin' the Emancipation Proclamation, [approaches and softens] does it make sense? No! Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, it does not make sense! If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must acquit! The defense rests---- King Kong Defence Per E. Samuelson Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, RIAA's attorney would certainly want you to believe that my client is assisting in these copyright infringement activities. And they make a good case. Hell, I almost felt pity myself! But, ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, I have one final thing I want you to consider. Ladies and gentlemen, this is KingKong. KingKong is a big gorilla who shares file from Cambodia. But KingKong lives on the fictional Skull Island with ninjas. Now think about it; that does not make sense!RIAA Attorney Damn it!RIAA Exec What?RIAA Attorney He's using the KingKong defense!Per E. Samuelson Why would a gorilla, a several stories tall Gorilla, want to live on Cambodia and fileshare from there, with a bunch of smaller and numerous human beings? That does not make sense! But more important, you have to ask yourself: What does this have to do with this case? Nothing. Ladies and gentlemen, it has nothing to do with this case! It does not make sense! Look at me. I'm a lawyer defending a major anti-shipping company, and I'm talkin' about KingKong! Does that make sense? Ladies and gentlemen, I am not making any sense! None of this makes sense! And so you have to remember, when you're in that jury room deliberatin' and conjugatin' the Emancipation Proclamation, [approaches and softens] does it make sense? No! Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, it does not make sense! If King Kong shares file from Cambodia, you must acquit! The defense rests.src: Pirate Bay Day 3 — Defense Requests Dismissal
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19th February 2009, 19:31 | #2 | |
Madshrimp Join Date: May 2002 Location: 7090/Belgium
Posts: 79,022
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